random thoughts

I am so rocking the Too Superlows today. They are effing HOTT. I love them sooo much cause they're like way broken in. Like thrift store jeans. They're also probably the slimmest-legged jeans I own, with only an 18.5" opening. For the longest time after flares became popular (1998, the year after I graduated high school) I couldn't wear them. I stuck to my darling wide-legs because I refused to admit that I had hips. (Very small ones, mind you. I'm totally apple shaped.) I used to have a teeny flat ass as well. But pregnancy and a lot of Haagen-Dazs have finally blessed me with a big old bubble. I also grew about three inches between age 16 and 21, so I don't have to cuff my pants anymore to keep from walking on them. Now, I wear my flare (and bootcut!) with pride.


Additionally. I think I am so lucky that I can eat a box of Tagalongs in one sitting (there ARE only fifteen in the box, you know) and all the ice cream and french fries that I desire, and can still somehow cram my ass into a size 11. I never thought I had any form of disordered eating, but when I think back on what I ate my senior year of high school, I realize that it's no wonder I wore a 4.


Breakfast: Half a bowl of oatmeal, glass of skim milk OR half a grapefruit, glass of ice water


Lunch: Lipton Cup-a-Soup (chicken noodle) OR a salad. Occasionally, some cheetos. Yum.


Dinner: Whatever I or my momma cooked. Usually it was chicken. Or steak. Mmmmm, steak.


Now, that sounds reasonable, right? I had a delicate stomach, you see. And I did pepper that with a LOT of McDonald's french fries and hot fudge sundaes over the course of my high school years. The thing is..... I was never limiting myself on purpose, or thinking about it. But. Was my delicate stomach just a mental thing? Or was I really prone to nausea? When I got preggers, I realized how easy it would be for me to become bulimic. I puked about 30 times a day for three months straight. I quickly learned how to make myself do it, just to be rid of the sick feeling. I could probably cough one up right now if you asked me to. In fact, I know I could, because I picked up what I thought was a clean mug about an hour ago, poured in coffee and milk, drank it all down, then got to the bottom and promptly discovered a rubbery mess of old milk goo. *shudder* Anyway. I'm not that fat. So yay.


One more thing: I so totally need to either get back on the pill or pregnant again soon. My face looks like a beeg-a peetza pie!